By: Rutendo. S Maturure
Who could body shame a man? Most of them are the reason why it’s a trend right?
Well unfortunately though different in some ways no one is immune to body shaming. It’s been an amazing journey for women to be built, celebrated, and appreciated of any size. But it’s time we address issues in line with brutally shaming boys and help those caged in the bodies of men get over the traumas they faced and still face. Many older men have faced challenges in facing their skeletons of not having been taught body self-love.
The impact is so great in that they inflict that shame on other men or women. The problem arises in that these are issues that remain still unaddressed. Society has a definition of what a ‘hot man’ should be like, while culture creates a cacoon of its own. These categories have created a division in selecting a certain preference of men to be better than the other.
After having conversations with several male personals, it was noted how they are victims too. They pretend it doesn’t get them because of various reasons that all seem encircled around religion, society, and culture. After all, they were taught boys/ men don’t cry. Yet we see them express the side effects of not speaking out or not being heard because of a system meant to set them apart from women.
It all begins in the streets, the locker room, dorm rooms, preschool, work, and wherever whenever anybody feels like targeting a man. It’s a shame such judgmental fangs are carried by victims too. Why should anybody be made to feel too ugly, fat, skinny, rough, short, or tall? After all, aren’t we all different and a combination of different blending?
Unfortunately, being a victim of body shaming is extracted from all ages. Making it harmful for many who end up depressed, abusing steroids, lack self-esteem, abuse others who are weaker, and even become suicidal. This has pushed many into routines that strain them more than helping them. Media putting so much pressure on men most feel the need to look and feel perfect. It makes it hard to come out and speak about it after all culture deems a crying man weak.
Body shaming has made men buy clothes they can’t afford or even want to wear. This is because they feel the need to hide features or blend in with the “perfect guys”. They avoid certain activities they used to enjoy because they are told or made to believe they don’t meet the standards needed. Believe it or not, some shun having sexual activities naked with their partners because they are ashamed. Weird right? Makes sense why the internet is drooling with many adverts about ‘penis enlargement’, ‘get rid of a pot belly’ in 48hrs, do this, do that. And sadly they never get to talk about these dark moments, side effects, or torture it presents to men who cannot afford or cannot be assisted.
Many of us might agree some men are never taught to love and appreciate what they have as body parts.it seen unmen like to have self-love to your body. It probably makes sense why others mishandle others and share the hate too. Instead, they find means to adjust to society so that they are noticed.
To whom do we blame? The fathers who teach their sons there is no reason to worship or respect the body? The mothers who callously model any food behaviours onto their children, the women who set high standards men cannot meet, the boys or men with good bodies teasing the rest, the toxic body haters or the media? I guess we are all at fault.
The behaviours tolerated towards men’s body-shaming have created the most deadly mental illness. For many years some men hate the way they look like being short, fat, having small genital, certain marks, no beard, too skinny or too light-skinned has made them victims. That boy who was told mean stuff is stuck and hurt. Those words are deeply ingrained in their mind. They feel they can never be the best, better, or the dream guy. In as much effort has been put to learn to ignore what people say about their features it’s a demon they fight.
The negative impact does not only affect them but it’s a toxic trait dripping in society. Those emotions bottled in as a boy or man will come out one day. Living under societal pressure certainly makes one uncomfortable and insecure. The same way girls are taught to love their bodies and appreciate who they are in the same thing we should do to boys. They have feelings too. They are not immune to anxiety, insecurities, or the toxic traits body shaming comes with.
This world can’t have men settling for one standard. Imagine not having a man with a healthy pot belly in any street? Having a Batman kind of body does not reflect strength at all.
Let’s be careful of the words we say and share. Stop spreading hate and body shaming men.
